3 Steps to Check your Emotions at the Door
In “Change Your Perspective, Change Your Life,” I talk to you about how changing your perspective is a huge game changer in how you see the world and yourself.
All it took was me committing the time and effort (although it was not easy) to change/adjust my perspective on everything. I began thinking about the importance of the things that I would get upset about. When I was able to label/rate the importance as low, and when I stopped needing for things to go the way I envisioned I could let the feeling of being upset go freely.
In my journey of self discovery I realized that I didn’t trust myself. I thought I did, but I truly didn’t. I lacked so much trust in myself (that was caused by fear) that I was unable to trust in other people or even the higher power (God) the way I should have. The true reason I felt the need to have so much control over everything was because I didn’t trust that things would work themselves out. I would say that I did, but I didn’t ACT like I did (Those are two different things).
When we truly trust (ourselves), our actions back up our words. This goes the same for other people. When we truly trust other people to do something for us (or themselves) we don’t micromanage them.
Sadly, that was something I had been subconsciously taught my entire life, to micromanage it. But we cannot micromanage our lives and then claim that we trust God and/or ourselves. That action alone goes against the grain of trust. We must allow God to guide your steps. And to top it off, we have to avoid anticipating/expecting the outcome of situations and people. With that said, I hope that these 3 steps below help you avoid unnecessary stress and frustration in your life that can come from over thinking.
3 Tips to decide if something is worth getting upset over:
1- Evaluate | When I say evaluate. Evaluate the situation (when you are more calm). Be sure that you stop and think about what you are getting upset over.
2- Rate | How serious or important is the thing/situation that you are getting upset about in the grand scheme of things? What’s the worst that can happen by it continuing to go the way it’s going?
(Rate from 1-5)
- 1-2 (It’s not important at all)
- 3 (It’s kind of important or you can’t decide)
- 4-5 (It’s Extremely important)
Once you have rated the situation, think: Is there anything you physically do to change it? If you think there is something you can do, how much good will it do? Often times in many situations you may just have to let it play out.
If there isn’t anything you can do to physically change it, then think to yourself: “Why am I tripping?” or “Why am I allowing my mind to go haywire and overthink this thing?” At the end of the day, just let it play out then let it go. Don’t put more energy into it than is necessary.
3- Let Go… & Trust | Trust in yourself, trust in God, and trust the universe that all things will work out the way they are meant to and that everything will ultimately work out for your good. For example, if you lose your job, you break up with your significant other, think from the perspective that everything will absolutely work out for your good and another better opportunity or person is on it’s way into your life.
When you relinquish control or your need for it, you will feel less heavy and freer to be yourself. Understand that not everything is going to fit a mold, not everything is going to go the way you want, and life will not always make sense. However, TRUST is a key factor and if you don’t currently trust you must look inward, work on yourself and understand why you feel the way that you do.
You may find that your feelings come from a place of needing control over how things turn out. You have free will, but it only allows you to make decisions; it doesn’t allow you to predict the turn out. In this process you must allow for the change/adjustment of your perspectives so that you can free your mind from unnecessary stress.
How will you take the first step to adjust your perspective? Have you followed any of these steps? Share your experiences below in the comments. Let’s Talk About It!